Assunta

Hello :)

The hols will officially be over in 45 minutes. =)

That also means that I’ll be an Assuntarian for just another 45 minute. Time can’t go faster, neither can it go slower.

I’ve detest my life. Now I’m trying to love it.

 

I’ll start being an Amanian tomorrow. Thus, making this the last post I’ll ever post as a present Assuntarian. Why do I feel nothing? It’s as though, all those years… vanquished.

My dearest friends, classmates and schoolmates. Please bear in mind that I AM NOT BETRAYING ANY OF YOU NEITHER AM I BETRAYING OUR ALMA MATER. I’m just doing what’s Best for me. For my future.

One cannot have a bright future in the midst of racism and Favouritism. I Love you all dearly. BUT I want to learn to love myself. For only then will I be able to be happy. Correct?

Herminians.. I’m sorry. I will no longer be your athlete. It’s been a GREAT pleasure. ANDA CEMERLANG HERMINE MENANG!

En. Mustafa. I’m sorry. I know you didn’t want me to switch schools. I know you need me in hermine. But YOU of all people should and WILL understand why I’m switching. My future depends on it. You’ve given me confidence. You’ve given me hope. Most of all, You’ve passed me a great deal of knowledge. I thank you for listening to my whines, whims, problems. I thank you for being my class teacher and my Bahasa Melayu Teacher. BUT most of all I thank you for showing me the right path.

Pn. Rose. Though I may refer to you as ‘The Dragon’, You’ve given me A LOT OF KNOWLEGDE. From the way we breathe to Meiosis II, I love you. XD Even if everyone hates you. You torture us mentally with your silence. But gain our respect and fear by being a fantastic, strict and always giving your best sort of teacher. =) THANK YOU! Without you… I would still be failing science.

Jane Tan and Tanya Ding. I know you guys have to remake the name list.. I’m sorry. I know I’m trouble. But look on the bright side. I’m gone =)

Remember, I am switching schools, for MY BENEFIT. I am not going there to start a fight. I want peace. I love trees.

I don’t know why I’m so emo about this. Well, maybe because this is my last post. I’m gonna change the link tomorrow. I’m gonna change the layout. I”M GONNA BE FRIGGIN’ HAPPY.Or at least I’ll try :)

Lots of pain and love,

Yours sincerely,

<—Assuntarian XD

                                                      Hayani.

Real Voices 2

So.. the reason why I haven't been blogging around here is that I've been chosen to take part in Youthsays, real Voices 2 Project. It's where, 50 selected youths from all over Malaysia come together and blog about their opinions on the given topics such as 1Malaysia, work and money etc etc. Its Really cooooll!

Go check it out. Cause I'm blogging with 49 other Awesome awesome people =)
www.realvoices2.blogspot.com

Youthsays: Real Voices 2

Me is selected to voive out me's opinions on things soooooo YEAY!!!
oh and I'm having EXAMS now... no time for this blog. BUT I'll be Back! XD

Btw.. I watched Ironman 2 already. Its not bad. I love the weapons! I wanna watch prince of persia ='( but I don't want to go alone...

TOKIO HOTEL!!!!!

IN LESS THAT 24 hours!!

AHHHHHH!!!!

I feel soo fangirly right now. XD

TOKIO HOTEL ROCKS!!!

Lterally. THEY DO!

I LOVE THEM!!

Sports 2010.

Honestly saying, Sports Day this year was SHIT. It sure didn't feel like the 50th anniversary of sports day of Assunta. I can't blame the students. Teachers on the other hand. FUCK! I don't think they give a damn. Screw that. THEY DONT GIVE A FUCKING DAMN! Stupid Assunta teachers. They think they are superior but when it comes to money, who do they turn to?? Us. The friggin' students who they have done a lot of wrong and injustice to. Can't they just invest some time and effort for us, the students,???

Moving on,

I won:

2nd for 100m

2nd for 200m

2nd for 4x100m.

See how much of a failure I am? All fucking silvers. no golds. I lost to the same person. A runner failed us. I can officially call myself a loser now. Not that I haven't been. =.=

All in all, I guess from another perspective, I did pretty well. But You must understand that I have my own goals and I haven't been reaching them. I want to. I need to. I must. To stop myself from crying to myself to sleep every single night because I still am a failure. So, Next year, I want all GOLDS.

Goodbye.

Extracted.

Love is Patient,

Love is Kind,

Love is Slowly,

Losing your Mind!

So today was... okay. Had a text from someone. Turned out that it was his sister who sent the messages. XD

The Verse above is from the movie 27 Dresses. I don't how how and I don't know why but I never tire from watching it. Hahaha!

I didn't think about falling, deceiving or anything like it much today. Hahaha. Though i was actually really pissed off at someone for being so unatheletic yet still wants to participate and be called an athelete. In the Emo world we call these "Posers".

And yes, I do have a crush. Not a good one. But at least I like someone. XD

Last, Dano if you're reading this. Pay attention to the fisrt paragraph and try to feel what i feel right now. I'm sure you know me enough to know big brother. =)

I smile because I have to,

Not because I want to,

Some people think it's scary,

But it's just fake; and empty.

Life goes on..

Form 4
Science Stream.
Vice President of Karate - do
Pianist for the Choir Club.
Representative for Hermine Sports house.

Hate. Love. Tomorrow IS Valentines Day. I'll be alone. Lonely.

So many things I'd like to express,
I just don't know where to start,
Feelings I'd hate to repress,
Someone, Rip it out of my heart!

-hayani-
13/2/10

Fifteen.

Happy Birthday, Dear Hayani!

You are 15 now. I'd expect you to love yourself more. But that expectation might end up in the midst of a black hole. So I ORDER you to be happy. If you don't then, you're a skunk and will probably end up a single old hag with twenty-seven cats. So There!

P.S : I don't think I'll be able to buy you that 'Nike Lunarglide+' That you wanted. Sorry =(

Hayani's Bitter Life ; Act VII

Quotation. =)

Bitterness. As the last PMR paper was taken from my hand.
I felt a slight pain. Everything I've worked for.
All those long and short hours of studying. Done.
That's it. Poof. I don't need them anymore.
Hmmm.. I wonder if it was worth it.
Copyrighted ~hayani

ALTRUISM! IM A WEINER! Cute twin and Retard twin. XD

hi mahirah;

'hi HAHA,how are you,retard twin? :D'

I love trees. and I love food. *tummy rumbling*
IWANTFOOD!

'why don't you take a bath and clean yourself NOW?'
and we can eat after that(!)

Speak for yourself, cute twin. =.=" pfft.

WHATEVS *bimbo smile :D*

Whatever biatch. XD

'That's the worst comeback eveeeer :D'

Pfft. homo. TREEESS!

lol,you got a gay boyfriend which is justin bieber

Yeah well, You've got a punk for bitch which is Oliver sykes.

FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUU :*

You fucked me then YOu kiss me?? *no comment*

'i love you no matter what,biiiiiiii-atch'

duuuhhh.. I'm your twin. XD (GO SAVE TREES!)

naaaaaah,

Lets go eat.

now?

Brush teeth 1st laaa ish3

FO' SHO

I love sho! XD

Damn you Sejarah!!!

Refering to the title, sejarah was anything but easy.

I felt soo hopeless while answering the questions using logic. The questions were detailed and as natasha said, weird. Only the unexpected came out. None of which were undetailed was in a funny way easy.

so, the conclusion is, the PMR sejarah paper of 2009 was/is hard, weird and funny.

In other news, the mathematics paper was fine. I thought i wouldn't be able to do some questions but nothing i couldn't do came out. I'm very thankful of that (alhamdulilah).

Tomorrow holds only one challenge. Which is the Living skills paper (KH) hopefully I'll be able to pull through. =)

Thats all for now. Tata.

PMR 2009!

It's here!! haha. I don't feel anything.

Bahasa Melayu = crap.
Agama = Okay laaa
English 1 = Normal (easy)
English 2 = Not bad. :)
Science 1 = Damn easy.
Science 2 = ah fuck it.
Geography = Okay laaa

I LOVE TREES!!!!! TO all FORM 3 students!! Please (if you can) give me your Pmr question papers... I wanna recycle them. OR you can recycle them yourselves. =)

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri!!

Forgive me if I've done wrong!

AND

If you're free on the 26th of september which is this saturday, come to my house!

The celebration starts at 8pm to 12am. The fireworks'll start at about 9.30pm.

I'm making Brownies, Carrot cake and cupcakes. My mum will be making the rest. =D

My lips are sealed XD

Why am I annoyingly in love with you.
Is it because you make my world meaningful,
I wish I had the courage to say I love you,
And that you are perfect and wonderful.

Courage, is what I lack,
To face you I’d need a smack,
I know you don’t love me,
But somehow my heart is not free.

Now and forever, will I love you,
I find this so comprehensibly true,
You will never know how I feel,
Because now and forever, my lips are sealed.
copyrighted ~hayani
http://www.deviantart.com/



A brainwave. While listening to someone talk. Yup. I know I write to much about how other people feel especially on the 'Love' subject.. It's because my love emotion ran away from me. XD
so I don't feel I see and hear. =)

Past Present and Future.

When I think of the past; I feel sad,
All my former glories and good times I had,
When I think of the present; I feel bad,
To think ; I have a really bad dad.

But when,

I think of the future ; I see hope,
I see the person I should and will be,
So here's a toast to the future,
For it is then; Will I be free.
Copyrighted 2009 ~hayani
http://www.deviantart.com/

Inspired by listening to someone talk.. I forgot who..

I'm sorry..

Today was hell.

My mum forgot about my guitar class and I tak dapat pergi.
I was Damn pissed off mann.. Guitaring (next to poetry) keeps my sane!
I cranky the whole fucking day. The effects are still visible.

My cousins and Uncle Hashim came today. Imagine 9 Girls in from the age 2 to 15. I was the odd one. I wore all black whereas the 8 of them wore pick. I dislike pink.

I had an Argument with a new friend of mine. I said his name wrongly. He corrected me. And being cranky I said that I don't care. So if you know who you are.. I am so so so so so so so so terribly sorry. I hope to earn your clarity in the future.

Dear Mother.

You needn't lie to me,

Your intentions were too clear,

You wanted to see him,

Just for that; my heart you smear.

Dear Mother; can't you see?

All the pain you're giving me,

Can't you see it in my eyes,

Or do you prefer to believe my lies.

With this pen, I write,

Always hoping to see; light,

But you condemn me by not caring,

Unlike other mothers who are loving.

Dear mother; I wonder why,

Why do you believe my lies,

Aren't you a mother who can see,

All my lies right through me.

Everyday, I experience suffering,

As I go through life without understanding,

I wonder when; you'll ask, How am I,

I guess it's not going to happen; that's not a lie.

Dear mother; Who am I?

A question that makes me want to die,

This burden is too heavy to carry,

You should answer it before you're sorry.

Written by ~hayani
Copyrighted by deviantart

11.36am. 27th of August. A boring day.

Heifer, conflagrant, concour, marred, repentance, counterintuitive, resilient.
English words are confusing aren't they? For instance why is "the" said as "de" and not "tee".
I suppose thats why is it porclaimed one of the most difficult language in the world.

In other news, my friend Allisha Azlan , 16, has been accepted to the United World College. Congratulaitions to her. She has been studying ever so hard to get in. Good luck in everything you do Allisha!

It's the hols. It's the month of ramadan. MOVIE TIME! So far I've watched G.I Joe, UP, Land of the lost and Aliens in the attic. Any recommendations from anyone about what I should watch next??

Modern times and past times.

I won 2 medals(1 Gold, 1 Silver) and thousands of bruises from the Karate Competition. Both of the events I took part in, was sparring.



Okay... So.. I got a gold medal.. that was one of my aim for this year.. yet my mother doesn't care. What does she care about??! For god sake. I have to stop worrying about what my mother thinks right??



Damn my family.



In other cases, I've learned what it's like to hate and be hated. I hate Typical malays. M0st of them are idiots. Just because I'm more open minded than they are. I've started writing again. I'll post a poem up soon. Patience is a virtue.

Thank you for caring Mahirah. Your benevolent thoughts are deeply reliefing.

Long time.

It has been a long time since I've posted anything. I believe it is simply because I do not have the time or I don't feel like surfing the net. What with PMR in 63 days I have a lot of studying to do and a lot of stress to confront.

I went to the spa today. =) I skipped school today.=( I coughed a lot today. =( I coughed out blood today. =(

1 pros and 3 cons. Not bad for a day eh?

As for my writing, I've been scribbling a lot of nonsense lately. I know no one reads my blog but I'm embaressed to post them. To let myself read it again is like reading an essay written by an illitrate nut or as the british say,an Anorak.

Last, I have been thinking of how empty my life is. I wonder how it got this way. I wonder how a happy nut turn into a miserable shell . Yes, I've been philosophical too lately. XD It is unfortunately unavoidable. So bear with it.

Right. That's all I'm willing to share.

Your very own miserable nut,

-hayani-